What job gets you laid the most?

What job gets you laid the most?
–Edward

The Harvard MBA says:

There are a number of careers that seem particularly suited to providing men with ample opportunities for sex.  Just off the top of my head, these include professional athlete, rock star, movie star, billionaire, fireman, pimp, and U.S. Senator.

However, these answers aren’t that useful, because most of us lack the talent to pursue any of these careers.  In terms of mainstream careers, the equation is probably Money + Glamor + Access.  For example, strip club manager gives you great access, but probably doesn’t help you too much with money or glamor.

The best bet is probably to pursue a career in finance.  It’s the most reliable way of getting rich, and most of your colleagues will be fat, balding men, which may help you look more attractive simply by way of contrast.  It also comes with a much lower chance of being shot than being a pimp.  And if you end up in jail, it’s probably a much nicer jail.

A dark horse career to consider comes by way of Mike Rowe, of Discovery’s “Dirty Jobs.”  Mike’s first job was as an opera singer in a local opera company.  He intended to stay in the job for 6 months, simply as a back door to a Screen Actor’s Guild (SAG) card.  He ended up staying a number of years, once he discovered the following:

1) Despite the jokes we tell about fat ladies singing, local opera companies are dominated by attractive young women

2) The few men who sing opera locally are usually either married or gay

As the only young, single, heterosexual male around, Mike reports that he did very well.  Enough to convince him to stay in the opera company for 6 years.

In other words, keep an open mind.  If everyone thinks a job will help them get laid, the employer will be swamped with applicants, and you’ll have a harder time achieving success–both on the job, and in the bedroom.  If you can channel your inner Mike Rowe and find a job which is off the beaten path (and off the path to beating off), you may find yourself in a good position–or positions.  And if you do find this magical career, be sure to report back, so that you can share the wealth with the Ask The Harvard MBA community.

9 Comments

  1. Iceman
    Posted January 4, 2011 at 5:51 am | Permalink

    “which may help you look more attractive simply by way of contrast”

    Another guy who thinks beauty and money gets ladies. Sad.

    PERSONALITY is what gets them. CONFIDENCE! But then again, as long as most men confuse toughness and arrogance with manliness they will always be wussies, and as such they will never get women who are truly desirable.

    I’m eagerly awaiting the next post entitled “what car gets you laid the most”, followed by “I bought her expensive jewelry on the first date and she dumped me, what happened”.

  2. Posted January 4, 2011 at 4:07 pm | Permalink

    I enjoy the bit about “channeling your inner Mike Rowe” — if most men don’t have the talent to be a fireman, then most men don’t have the talent to channel their inner Mike Rowe. The dude is a king.

    While I doubt very seriously that the question was a serious one, I am surprised you didn’t respond that it doesn’t matter nearly as much what you do for a living as how you present yourself.

  3. admin
    Posted January 4, 2011 at 5:37 pm | Permalink

    Iceman,

    I agree that personality an important factor, but the question was specifically about career choice.

    Obviously, jobs are insufficient, or every finance guy would have found true love.

  4. Iceman
    Posted January 7, 2011 at 10:57 am | Permalink

    So you just make some stuff up about how money and beauty is important to satisfy the guy instead of telling him what he needs to hear? Do you always do that, tailoring your answer to the question, or just this time? Man, you just lost all your credibility.

  5. Posted February 15, 2011 at 5:24 am | Permalink

    Iceman is right. It’s personality + confidence + not fearing failure + and some combination of alpha (social, dominant) and beta (making a girl feel special) traits. If you want just ONS all the time then go alpha, otherwise mix them depending on your personality to signal to her what sort of relationship you want.

    Finance is a little boring. A lot of finance people won’t have time to get laid, maybe they buy a golddigger and can show off that they’ve a 20 year old when they’re old, but frankly that’s sad. In contrast you could develop personality. Like my dance instructor is 45, not that fit, and dates gorgeous 20 year olds. Because he has all sorts of interesting personality and hobbies and life experience. Even though he’s poor.

    Bottom line is you need a bunch of major traits to get laid or a nice relationship, financial stability is one, but piles of money not really, unless you just want golddiggers.

  6. PimpDoctor
    Posted April 28, 2011 at 5:17 pm | Permalink

    Doctors with Nurses or anything that moves in a hospital

  7. Cyrano
    Posted September 6, 2011 at 5:20 am | Permalink

    Photographers! I don’t know how many times girls who want to do headshots but “offered” something else in terms of payment. My friend gets all the girls he ever needed.

  8. ey?
    Posted February 22, 2012 at 1:48 pm | Permalink

    You MBA types have it all wrong. The best jobs for getting laid are; Nightclub promoter, nightclub owner, nightclub table host. Nothing comes close. Think about it, we are paid to charm beautiful women.

    My colleague became a centurion at the tender age of 21. Yes it is that easy to sleep with 100 women. Myself at the age of 24, as i was a wee bit older and at times slightly disinterested by the sheer hedonism.

    Beautiful women pre-selected for their looks, so the club’s are full of 7s and above. We get free access to the hot commodity (alcohol) which is ridiculously overpriced for anyone who wasn’t a promoter, a host, or an owner. The finance guys all struggled to get laid even after spending thousands on champers, ditto the billionaires whilst we were having wild orgies every night with our girls. The girls would follow us to different clubs as they were dependant on us for entry, drinks, table, star treatment etc.

    The only other guys that could match our numbers were the celebrities but then again they always had to conceal their shenanigans as the paparazzi hassled them to no avail.

    Like Iceman said we all had the personality + confidence + not fearing failure + and some

    combination of alpha (social, dominant) and beta (making a girl feel special) traits.

    Our status game was unmatched despite being around movie stars high financiers billionaires and alike. We were the ones who introduced them to this world. We were cocky and natural and cool in such an environment despite a lack of great wealth or fame. We had such a harem around our table we could never get jealous so the women had very little bargaining power over us – their looks? Hardly a tool, seeing as every girl in the club is a head turner. We made them feel special to be there. VIP access? to queue outside or get ushered in? A table to pose around or stand awkwardly in the corner? Premium vodka or premium champagne? We had all the power and status, with a surplus of women eager to be validated. Yes my friend it was that easy.

  9. admin
    Posted February 22, 2012 at 2:24 pm | Permalink

    EY wins this comment forever. Nicely done, sir.

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